Why You Don't Add Your Boss on Facebook

How to Fix the Economy

Dear Mr. President,

Patriotic retirement: There's about 40 million people over 50 in the work force, pay them $1 million apiece severance with the following stipulations:
1) They leave their jobs. Forty million job openings - Unemployment fixed.
2) They buy NEW American cars. Forty million cars ordered - Auto Industry fixed.
3) They either buy a house/pay off their mortgage - Housing Crisis fixed.

Can't get any easier than that!

Potential vs Reality

Youngest Son: "Tell me Daddy, what is the difference between 'Potential '
and 'reality'?"

Dad: "I will show you"
Dad turns to his wife and asks her: "Would you sleep with Robert Redford
for 1 million dollars"?

Wife: "Yes of course! I would never waste such an opportunity"!

Then Dad asks his daughter, if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for 1 Million
dollars?
Daughter: "Wow! Yes! He is my fantasy!"

So Dad turns to his elder son and asks him: "Would you sleep with,TomCruise
for 1 million dollars"?
Elder Son: "Yeah! Why not? Imagine what I could do with 1 million Dollars!
I would never hesitate!"

So the father turns back to his younger son saying: You see son,
'Potentially' we are sitting on 3 million dollars, but in 'Reality' we are
living with 2 prostitutes and 1 gay.

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Shoplifting Dog - CNN

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Talking Stain